Beach day!

Its been one of those highly emotional weeks for Gordon and me. Full of worry, angst and what not. Just another typical day in the life of newlyweds just starting out. Worries abound but our love keeps us together. Other than that, nothing exciting has happened at all. The weather was pretty average the last couple of days full of rain and coldness. It was a complete switch from all the sunshine and hotness we were having the week before.

The reason for the angst and worry was, what else, money issues. My lack of a job still has me feeling like I'm not contributing anything to this marriage besides my lackluster cooking skills. We would be free of this debt a lot more faster if I had a job. So I had an insane idea running through my head. What if I moved back to America, got a job, and sent some of my earnings back to Gordon for our bills and saved the rest, minus living expenses of course. So, I impulsively called my mother and asked her that if I moved back to America would I be able to find a job in ABQ because I desperately needed one for Gordon and me.

Every day the news keeps becoming more grim. Immigration of Kiwis back to New Zealand is rising which means more unemployment for those trying to find a job. The economy is becoming crap. It feels like one bad step after another. It was really sad to see all those homes burnt in Australia as well. I couldn't really watch the news because I couldn't bear to see those poor people talk about what they had lost. So many people died in the fires and there are still more going. It looks like arson might be the reason for some of them but a electrical wire might be the cause of the one that killed so many people. Its pure speculation at this point until they investigate it properly though.

Gordon wasn't having a good day either because he had found out that his physical fitness qualification had expired and had to do it that day! The reason was because he was going to play for the Air Force team the next week and that was when the next test was. They didn't know if he could play without an updated physical fitness test or not. So they had someone test him that day and he passed. It all started because he turned in his contract extension, we decided to sign up for ten or eight more years with the Air Force, and was getting his doctors exam when they saw that his physical fitness qualification had expired.

Gordon and I talked our frustrations and worries out though. It was good to find out that he worries about our bills as much as I do; he just doesn't show it like me. Gordon is going to join the Ohakea golf society for $50 instead of Rangitikei for $380 and I'm selling stuff on TradeMe and making cards to sell. We're each sacrificing something for each other. After all the raw and sad emotions we had, I decided that I should write him a letter to show him exactly how I felt. Which is that I love being with him despite our financial difficulties and woes. I told him that we would only ship me back to America if we were very, very, very, very, very desperate. I'm always a lot more "vocal" with my words then when I try to say them out loud. Whenever I say it out loud it just sounds really corny to me, like something from a movie scene. He did appreciate the letter and I was rewarded with a hug and a kiss. I told him that whatever life brings us I want him to be the guy beside me through it all. I also said something about him finding the missing piece to make me whole. Even when I read it now it still feels a little corny to share with y'all.

Despite a bad week of emotions, everything was washed away on Valentine's day! Saturday totally made up for any bad stuff that went down during the week. We didn't do anything extravagant because of our money problems. It was such a nice, sunshiny day though and we decided to take advantage of the good weather by going to the beach! We had three beaches to choose from and we decided to go to Himitangi beach and save Tangimoana and Foxton for another weekend. We didn't know what kind of beach it may be so we decided that we would just have fun on the beach rather than in the waves. It was pretty awesome because you got to drive your car right up to the coast and the beach was only a couple of feet away from us. You do have to be careful for dune buggies and other cars driving around.

We did everything a young couple in love should do, that was PG of course. We had a nice walk along the beach, had a picnic on the sand, ran into the waves and got our pants wet... Despite all the trouble that living in New Zealand seems to be for me, there's always something to remind me why I fell in love with this place. It helps that I'm with someone I absolutely adore as well. Gordon and I even built a sand castle. You can't go to the beach without building a sand castle! We decided to call it Castle Flora because of the old butter container we were using to build the mounds with. It was oh so much fun and we even through the small nerf football around. I had to stop after awhile though because catching it was making my arms red. I noticed that there were little gold flecks in the sand too. It reminded me that each beach is different in its composition, kinda like people in a way. It was an absolutely fantastic beach day that will be forever in my memory. To top it off, I even got to drink Vanilla coke! How awesome is that?

Gordon is off playing Cricket this week so I'm here alone. Its been a week full of "what else can go wrong?" but I'll tell you about that next week. Its going to be okay though because Gordon comes home Friday and I can't wait! I told him that if he gets picked for Interbase golf then I'm taking my own mini-vacation without him for a whole week so he knows how it feels. As if I could ever go on a vacation without the love of my life! Everyone have a good week and stay warm. The sun has come out over here and it looks like another hot week is in store for us.